Is that underwear?

Just so you don't get ahead of yourself, people who think I've got my cool together, it was a good hour or so at the bar before I realized I had something stuffed inside the leg of my pants I put on as I got ready for dancing.
I went to the bathroom - it was a pair of freshly laundered .. .underwear. I transferred them to my leather jacket.
Yes, and somehow I get around the world alone.